3 months into the
island life and I feel like a completely new person compared to the
girl who got off the plane in August. I knew this would be a
life-changing adventure but I had no idea that it would be a journey
beyond my wildest dreams. If someone on New Year's Eve had told me
that in 10 months I would be single (at the time I had a boyfriend
with whom I was planning a future with), living on my own in a 15 m2
container box (new Scandinavian building style) on an island that I
had never heard before (Brexiting the UK and giving up my goal of
obtaining the British passport one year before my qualifying time?!)
where I would move to make pizzas (making pizzas with a first-class
honours degree and getting back to hospitality from the world of
recruitment?!) after a period of being high on life -and no, I
wouldn't need mind altering substances to feel that way- in
Nottingham that I would cherish for the rest of my life (moving back
to Nottingham from Manchester and get back to square one?!), I would
have laughed at them with deep conviction that they must be out of
their mind to say such nonsense.
10 months. The lowest
and highest moments of my life. One alien face (emotional mumps
resulting in half a swollen face) that started the chain reaction of
drastic changes that some may say would be enough for a lifetime. One
dead-end career quitting. One dead-end relationship ending. The
longest time I have ever spent in the comfort of home, sweet home
over the last 8 years since moving abroad, not having a clue what the
f*ck I was going to do with my life. One city move. One 'business
partner' who as much as stepped me in the back, made me discover my
passion for making pizza babies (and everything aside, I will forever
be grateful to her for that). One community of wonderful people who
not only gave me a sense of belonging, but taught me to embrace my
#happinessrevolution mindset alongside my happy dance and organised
the most memorable birthday/farewell party I could have ever asked
for (well, memories of it are blurred but my burnt hair suggested it
was a blast :D). One big reconnection with my dearest friend/ chosen
family/ partner-in-crime that reminded me that bonds may not always
be visible between soulmates but could never really been torn apart.
One calling from fate which resulted in me taking a leap of faith and
moving not only countries but outside the EU. 6 months in total of
travel restriction starting from the day I set foot on the land of
rainbows, waterfalls and maybes in order to obtain working and living
visa for a year ('minor' detail that wasn't shared upfront the move).
Dream wages promoted (the 40% taxes on wages and the cost of living
being about 40% higher than in the UK take you quickly back to
reality from dreamland) that never hit your account without having to
chase them. One of the smallest capitals in the world with lambs,
horses and chickens in the back yards. 2 bags of my life on me. 3
dreadful but character-building months in very challenging living
conditions. Going back to basics, proper hippie life. Minimalism.
Solitude. Peace. Quietness. Soul-retreat. Remote island life.
Here I am sat in the
motivational corner of my happy little bubble where I moved into a
week ago, feeling more inspired by life than ever before. I have a
bed, a kettle, a set of plates and cutlery, a mug, a glass, a
chopping board, a pan and a pot (oh, and I also treated myself to a
potato masher so I don't have to mash potatoes with a fork anymore!).
And for the first time in 3 months I can finally have a shower
without my slippers on! And when you burst out in a big smile
everytime you step into the shower barefoot simply because you feel
blessed to be able to do that, well... that is the moment you realise
how much life has put things into perspective and taught you to
appreciate what you have no matter how little that is. I don't have
my fancy kitchen appliances, a wardrobe with the abundance of clothes
to choose from nor my beloved shoe and bag collection to match my
outfits...The level of comfort in materialistic measures is well
below what I was used to and yet, I feel more comfortable than ever
before. I walk 20 minutes to the bus in 'Siberian' weather to get to
work (time to look for a proper water and wind proof winter coat but
that mission will be a challenging one as I am not willing to give up
on my sense of style -yet- and put a boring black thing on that looks
like a giant layered bin bag for the price of gold!) fighting the
elements (but hey, I started to sing out loud listening to music
while walking to downtown because A. it keeps me and my spirit warm
and B. in the strong wind no one can hear that I may have gone crazy :D)... The level of comfort in climate measures is weeeeeell below
what thought I could handle and yet, I embrace it thinking if I can
survive here without a car sometimes walking 45 minutes with my
shopping to get home (on a badly timed weekend day when I miss the
bus that only runs once an hour), I will surely survive on the
Camino! And it is all worth it!
For the first time,
work is part of my soul-retreat (not something I need to get away for
soul-retreat from!). I have an amazing boss, my pizza babies and 4
teenage guys working alongside me (yes, the island is in such a deep
hole employment-wise with more jobs than workforce that it is normal
for youngsters still in school to fill the gaps) who I love to pieces
even if sometimes I feel like they are training me for the
challenging times of motherhood. Financially me being here may not be
as rewarding as expected but I am gaining so much more then money! I
am learning from an outstanding, passionate and down to earth
entrepreneur how to run a successful and well-respected business
despite the challenges of workforce, suppliers and limited working
space. I have met some amazing chefs who are always happy to teach me
about basics, something I lack as working in a professional kitchen
is very different to the pizza world I fell in love with without any
conscious preparation or training (and as much as I have a passion
for cooking, I am a passionate amateur when it comes to kitchen
skills and knowledge, and I will certainly need to work on those if I
ever want to run my own cafe one day...). My social circle is as tiny
as the island is compared to the rest of the world, but I am
surrounded by wonderful people whose genuine generosity makes me feel
blessed beyond measures, whether that means getting out of bed at
midnight to give me a ride home from work if there is no one else to
give me a lift (I live 1 hour walk away and the buses don't run at
night), buying vegan butter for me because they know I have struggled
to find it anywhere, letting me crash for the night at their place
(and always having at least hummus in their fridge for me) just to
get me out from the nightmare of the crazy household I was living in,
or offering me a winter jacket so I don't have to buy one for a price
that nearly equals to the amount of my rent (I have received a phone
call from a friend just now saying she is coming to town and is
bringing one of her own ones for me to keep if it fits and I like
it). And last but very much not least, the island has made me
reconnect with myself on a deeper level than I had ever got to do
before. It really feels like I am on a spiritual journey towards
becoming a better, calmer, happier and more balanced version of
myself because the island has kicked me right out of my comfort zone
and shaken the fog out of my head that looking back now, I think I
had been living with. All that external and inner noise, all that
stuff that we get wrapped up in whilst willingly putting ourselves
into emotional and materialistic prison, all that urge to exceed
expectations, all that need for validation that we endure in
autopilot mode as natural part of our 'modern' way of living, seem to
have vanished in me and got replaced with clarity, perspective,
gratitude and happiness. I feel deeply grounded, a term that I could
never fully understand until now.
I am far from having
all the answers but if anything, looking back at the chain reaction
of the last 10 months of my life, I learnt the lesson to stop chasing
them. Life has its mysterious ways of presenting us with answers to
our questions in moments when we are ready and able to not only hear
but listen. I am a firm believer in fate, I have always been and will
always be (probably this is one of the very few things that the
island hasn't made me change my outlook on) but I have to admit there
has been an adjustment to my philosophy on that matter. And that is
my message for today: don't just go with the flow, BE the flow!
Welcome everything you encounter along your way with an open heart,
embrace everything and everyone as your teacher in life, let things
mould you for the better like a river is shaped by its courses, but
always remember you are in complete control over where you are
headed. Yes, sometimes we have absolutely no control over certain
things that fate/god/the higher power (everyone has the freedom to
label it as they wish) rolls into our way but we certainly are in
complete control over how we react to both the expected and
unexpected. Recognise and appreciate the abundance you already have
in your life instead of focusing on the lack of it and even when you
find yourself against all odds, stand firm with your flow because 'a
river cuts through rock not because of its power but because of its
persistence'.
Happy Thursday x
